Mommy: The Destroyer of Dreams and Purger of Your Precious Crap

by Leila on February 7, 2012

Children come with too many freaking accessories.

Babies have so many clothes that most don’t even get worn before the little spawns outgrow them.

Toddlers require a lot of gadgets to entertain/enrich/appease them. They also come with more safety gear to protect them and us since they are like mini Godzillas with a mean temper tantrum.

Then enter the world of books, crafts, puzzles, dress up clothes, games and all things that help a developing preschoolers mind.

Beyond that age they begin to voice real opinions on what they like and what they don’t.

I’m pretty sure my kids are hoarders and I also blame my Dad for this. I tend to blame him for everything because A) It’s usually applicable and B) That’s what he gets for not reading my blog. He holds on to a lot of sentimental things that he just can’t part with. I get that. I do it as well on a mild scale… don’t even begin to ask about all the craft supplies I have!

My kids hold on to everything. EVERYTHING. They don’t even like to throw away packaging. This past month my back has been all sorts of messed up so the house has started to look like Toys R Us vomited all over the place. It makes me absolutely insane that I can’t accomplish everything that I want to but I’ve been limited.

It sucks big ones.

So, I gave the kids warnings. Many many warnings. I told them as soon as my back was better and I could bend and lift again that I would be purging if they didn’t get it under control.

That day was today.

My back is still messed up however I just couldn’t take it anymore.

I’m three bags into the purging process and it feels good. The kids are upset of course. They make their cases. They plead. They cry. I do feel bad but c’mon… kids have WAY too much crap! I always worry if these moments are going to upset or hurt them. I wonder how much damage I am doing. I know what needs to be done though.

Most of the toys are getting donated to a women’s shelter and the broken toys get sent off to the dump. Yup. To that black hole of unwanted and unloved toys.

My son even had the nerve to bring up Toy Story 3 when I tossed out a broken Buzz Lightyear. You know what scene I am talking about. With tears in his eyes I said “I am the destroyer of dreams! TO THE DUMP!”…

I was genuinely trying to be evil but he laughed at me. Then he spent ten minutes picking up toys yelling “TO THE DUMP!”. We laughed… and made games out of picking up and purging and that Mommy guilt was gone.

For now it seems to not be life shattering… until there is another moment where I put on my evil cape and become Mommy the Destroyer of Dreams again. Until then… it’s nice to see the damn floor.

About Leila DontSpeakWhinese

Leila, aka The Ninja, is the advocate for all things not whining. Parenting is fun when everyone stops b*tching! She is the Mom of a big blended family of five awesome kids. They ninja kick through life together. Oh and she is a total jackass.


  1. Xenia says:

    My 6 year old is the same way. I’m pretty sure my 12 and 15 year old could care less hanging onto stuff but he’s in full attack mode if I even look at one of his things wrong. I’d say I don’t know where this comes from but I know it’s me lol I can’t help it, I like having STUFF!
    Xenia recently posted..The Strangers in Our Lives.My Profile

    1. Leila says:

      I go in spurts of wanting a minimalistic life and then hoarding my books/craft supplies like a greedy little gnome. I can part with things easily though… my kids can’t!
      Leila recently posted..The Best Burgers You Will Ever Have, Slater’s 50/50: Burgers By DesignMy Profile

  2. ChiMomWriter says:

    My house next, please? I’m actually working on a post about not just the hoarding of everything, but the fact that Abby is obsessed with keeping everything in bags and suitcases. She’s ridiculous. I have to steal bags back at night. Oy.
    ChiMomWriter recently posted..Freeway ContortionistMy Profile

    1. Leila says:

      OMG! my kids both love stuff to put stuff in then they put that stuff in stuff and stuff it somewhere!

      Did that make you dizzy?? haha
      Leila recently posted..Visiting Joshua Tree National ParkMy Profile

  3. Carolyn West says:

    When I simply can’t stand the mess any more, I fill those garbage bags when they’re at school and they never even know what’s missing. Pretty sad that I can literally throw out half of their stuff and they don’t even know it.
    Carolyn West recently posted..5 Things I Do WellMy Profile

    1. Leila says:

      It’s when they see it that it suddenly becomes the things they love more than anything and they can’t be without. ;)
      Leila recently posted..Last Minute Camping Trips in the Rain are RadMy Profile

  4. Amy says:

    Let me know if you find a gray & black sock ;)

    1. Leila says:

      He lost a sock too?! hahaha Actually we found a stockpile of socks ;)
      Leila recently posted..WTF Did You Say?! Dreams, Poop and AnatomyMy Profile

  5. Dude, I’ve done The Big Purge so many times that it shouldn’t be possible for my kids to have to much crap! I swear that they’re trucking it in while I’m asleep at night. But now THEY think it’s fun to throw stuff out. They actually have contests to see who can get more bags of crap out of their rooms and closets.
    Most recently, Hubs won. He donated 7 garbarge bags of clothes to GoodWill. Dude. No human… let alone a blue collar DUDE… should have 7 garbage bags of donate-able clothing removed from their closet and still have clothes left! He DOES! Stop the insanity! But the good news, I FINALLY got him to pitch a couple of ties that he’s had since High School. Dude…. that was soooo 1994!!!
    Sarah @ The Fence recently posted..Sunday Funday #19My Profile

    1. Leila says:

      LOL! I wish that still worked with my kids. We used to have similar contests but now they are like greedy lil clutter gnomes. It needs to stop. It really does. haha

      I can’t even imagine what kind of clothes your husband tossed out! 7 bags!? That’s crazy!
      Leila recently posted..The Best Burgers You Will Ever Have, Slater’s 50/50: Burgers By DesignMy Profile

  6. We did the same thing this summer. I thought my girls were going to have seizures and oh the tears. You’d have thought I was torturing them but on some level I suppose it felt like that to them but they keep fucking everything. My girls adjusted too just like your kids did and soon I could tell they were feeling good about cleaning. I LOVE LOVE LOVED this post. I can so relate. So I do not think I scared my daughters it did take a while before my little one would leave me alone in the toy room for fear I would purge. Secret… I do sometimes when there not looking. They keep everything for god sakes!!

    1. Leila says:

      I found a stack of empty cardboard in my daughters room. I think she really is turning in to a hoarder!!!!

      I usually purge a lot when they aren’t here but sometimes the lesson has to sink in and they have to witness it. I’m evil like that ;)
      Leila recently posted..Visiting Joshua Tree National ParkMy Profile

  7. A month ago, if you had told me that babies have way too many clothes & accessories, I would have laughed my ass off and still nervously wondered if I had everything that I needed. I swear nesting makes women go insane. We’re not just overstocked on clothes. I own THREE diaper bags! Why? I can’t explain it now, but I’m sure it made sense when I was out buying them all.

    Ruby hasn’t even reached her first month’s birthday, and I’m already in full-on purge mode. Luckily, pregnancy is in the air around here, so my clutter can be passed on to some mama’s who can make good use of it!
    ipatchntshirt recently posted..Sailing isn’t so smooth when you don’t have a map, a compass, or a clue!My Profile

    1. Leila says:

      I had a bunch of diaper bags and way too much baby loot with both of the kids. I also had a hard time saying no to free loot so I seemed to attract free diaper bags! haha

  8. Lindsey says:

    While it won’t help stacks of cardboard, when I was around that age my mom put all my toys into garbage bags (all of them) and put them in the attic…I got one bag back at a time until I could keep it clean for something like 3-4 days in a row, and then I’d get another bag back. I don’t remember this, but she claims that it’s not only true, it worked. If only she’d done it to my sister too…

    1. Leila says:

      I’ve tried that too. There was a massive purge because so many things got taken away AND the kids had no TV/Games for over a month. Ugh. I think some things are just personality… and my dear sweet 9 year old hoarder will never have a perfectly clean place… but there HAS to be a balance!

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